Teachers #ChangeTheWorld #ChooseKind

The novel Wonder by R.J. Palacio plants the seeds of acceptance and inclusion to all who read it. Chris Jones, a middle school teacher in Capistrano Unified School District in Orange County, California, recognized the positive impact this book would have on students.  She took it upon herself to develop a 6^th grade curriculum using the #ChooseKind theme in Wonder.  Mrs. Jones piloted the program last year with two schools in the district and then offered it to all 6^th grades for the 2016-17 school year. 

Peter with Ladera Ranch Middle School Teacher, Chris Jones

Peter with Don Juan Avila Middle School Principal, Josh Wellison

The curriculum includes lesson plans developed and organized by Jones as well as materials from both RandomHouse and Children’sCraniofacial Association.  She worked locally with Coto de Caza Charity Classic’s annual fundraiser, raising enough funds to purchase a copy of Wonder for every 6th grader in the district.  CUSD is one of the country’s largest school districts with fourteen middle schools and about 4,000 sixth graders.  Nine of the fourteen middle schools participated in the #ChooseKind curriculum.

Ladera Ranch Middle School Projects

Shorecliffs Middle School Project 

In addition to hosting a training session for all the participating teachers, Mrs. Jones invited each school to host a #ChooseKind Wonder assembly.  My 16-year old son, Peter Dankelson, and I traveled from Illinois to California, bringing the story to life for Capistrano students.

Aliso Viejo Middle School

1 of 3 Assemblies at Ladera Ranch Middle School

Marco Forster Middle School

Peter and our family, like all CCA Kids, represent a true Wonder story.  Hearing from Peter gives students a better understanding of what it’s really like to live with a facial difference, why kindness should matter to them, and why it’s not always enough to just be “friendly.”  We educate students about trachs, feeding tubes, cochlear implants, and fake ears in a fun and educational format that puts everyone at ease and invites questions.  We explain why these devices are needed and how they are used.  Students get to hold each device, including Peter’s prosthetic ear!  By the end of the assembly, kids are no longer thinking about Peter's facial difference but are, instead, more interested in his favorite Star Wars movie or video game.  Making the real-life connection reinforces Wonder’s lesson about the value of diverse friendships and how anyone can #ChooseKind anytime, anywhere.

Vista del Mar student asks Peter is he wishes he could change how he looks

Peter Takes a Selfie with Shorecliffs 6th Graders

Peter and I were welcomed at all the CUSD middle schools we visited during our week of appearances.  Students showed us kindness with their applause, standing ovations, and chants of ‘Peter, Peter.’  Amber, a sixth grader at Shorecliffs Middle School, even surprised us by paying for our dinner at a local restaurant!  Another student raised his hand during the Q & A, not to ask a question, but to ask if he could shake Peter’s hand.  As a Mom, it was so heartwarming to witness how excited the students were to meet Peter, have him sign their copy of Wonder, and want to connect with him on social media.

Peter signs books at Niguel Hills Middle School

Peter signs a Wonder-blue cast at Newhart Middle School

Niguel Hills student asks to shake Peter's hand

Ladera Ranch students give Peter a standing ovation

Marco Forster students thank Peter for the assembly

Niguel Hills students have fun taking a selfie with Peter

Carl Hankey students pledge to #ChooseKind

When coupled with a real-life connection, students become inspired to cultivate a community of kindness in their school.  Students who are inspired to be kind make school a safe and fun place for everyone!

Thanks to teacher Chris Jones for bringing this lesson and experience to sixth graders at Capistrano UnifiedSchool District.

1 of 2 assemblies at Niguel Hills Middle School

Poster at Vista del Mar Middle School

#ChangeTheWorld #ChooseKind

The Great Kindness Challenge

Many schools nationwide participated in The Great Kindness Challenge this past week.  Our family was invited to Half Day School in Lincolnshire, IL to kick off their week of activities, and we had a great time speaking with the students and sharing our message to #ChooseKind.  Thanks for their donation to Children's Craniofacial Association in honor of our visit!

Amy Rutledge at WGN-TV Chicago joined us at Half Day School to cover Peter's story.  We were then invited to be on the WGN-TV Morning News.

As we move forward in 2017, we look forward to sharing our #ChooseKind message with even more students!

Peter's Story on WGN-TV Chicago

Steve Cochran Show Interview with Amy Rutledge about Peter's Story (starts at 30:45)

The Great Kindness Challenge

Celebrate #ChooseKind Day on 10/10!

October 10th is being recognized as national #ChooseKind day by fans of the book Wonder by R.J. Palacio.  Auggie is the hero of the story and celebrates his birthday on 10/10.  Here is how you can show your support for #ChooseKind & CCA Kids.

1. Perform a random act of kindness and post about it on social media using the hashtag #ChooseKind
2. Support Peter and Jacob's fundraiser by ordering a #ChooseKind shirt.  Post a pic of yourself wearing the shirt and use the hashtag #ChooseKind
3. Donate $10 to Children's Craniofacial Association in honor of Auggie's 10/10 birthday, Note #ChooseKind Day in the "in Honor of" text box.

Listen to Peter's interview about #ChooseKind Day on RAREcast!

One act of kindness can absolutely change the world.  Be that change and #ChooseKind!

How Did You Spend Your Summer?

Summer breaks are the best time to have surgery and clinic appointments for kids with complex medical needs.  Peter is no exception and spent several days at hospital clinics.  The surgery he had this past summer, however, was 100% his own decision.  Peter, who was born with microtia/atresia (missing his left ear entirely), elected to have surgery for a Cochlear implant called a bone-anchored hearing aid (BAHA).  Peter can hear normally on his right side but is profoundly deaf on his left. This means he is unable to localize sound, hear anyone on his left side, and struggles in loud environments.

With every grade advancement, Peter struggled more with his hearing loss.  Last year, he was especially challenged.  He was a freshman at a larger, public high school trying to make new friends. I can't imagine his frustration at being unable to hear conversations at lunch or in the hallways.  Any loud, crowded gathering was impossible for him to enjoy and left him isolated and exhausted.

Starting in second grade, Peter had access to the BAHA technology by wearing the device on a headband.  Not ideal, but I never wanted him to go through the surgery without testing it.  He would never consistently wear the headband at school or use the FM system that was provided with it.  It was a constant struggle.  When I would ask him if it helped, he would give a non-committal answer. He knew that giving the slightest positive remark might mean having surgery.  His response was always, "I don't want to look like Frankenstein with something sticking out of my head."  The irony of this statement always made me laugh because he already has obvious craniofacial differences. But, I understood his desire not to invite more opportunities for staring.

Now, for those of you unfamiliar with this surgery, it is not a huge bolt sticking out of your head! Rather, it's a small snap (like something you would see on Barbi clothes) and barely noticeable. I could've argued about it with him, but I just let it go.  I did not want to force this surgery.  I was also uncomfortable with possible complications-- skin grafts, infection risks, and daily care requirements. I believed that Cochlear would eventually develop a better and safer way to adhere the sound processor, and, fortunately, they did. 

Cochlear now offers the BAHA Attract.  By placing a magnet on top of the retaining screw (the part implanted into the skull to enable bone conduction), there is no need to have the screw protrude from the head.  Thus, no need for a skin graft or daily care of the site.  Even better, no Frankenstein bolt!

Cochlear Attract System

What really sold Peter, however, is that the sound processor is now blue-tooth capable and can be controlled via an app on his iPhone.  He was given a trial to use for a couple of weeks and within a few days of using it, he said, "I think I want to have this surgery."  That was a courageous statement coming from a kid that will do just about anything to avoid surgery.  It was then obvious to me that it was time to move forward with the BAHA.  My job as his primary caregiver and advocate was to make it happen.  This time, unlike many others, my job was easy.

Dr. Michael Shinners, a neurotologist specializing in neurological disorders of the ear, was perfect for Peter's needs.  Dr. Shinners is an excellent surgeon who really listens to and cares for his patients and their families.  He worked with me to understand Peter's anxieties and to ensure the best and safest procedure for the surgery.  Peter has a complex airway, so anesthesia is always a concern.  The team that worked with us at NorthShore's Highland Park Hospital was attentive and professional.  We were very happy with Peter's care from pre-op to discharge.

The night before the surgery, I learned via social media that one of Peter's friends from Children's Craniofacial Association was having the same surgery on the same day.  I was so happy they had each other for support.  It helped Peter knowing that he was not alone, and they had fun comparing scars and haircuts afterwards.  This is one of the many reasons we love our CCA family!

Peter & Ryan - CCA Friends Since 2005

Surgery Day with younger brother, Jacob

Peter was "activated" with the BAHA sound processor one month after surgery.  His eyes lit up and his smile was HUGE when the audiologist turned it on.  Thanks to Dr. Shinners and his team, including audiologist Dr. Susan Marek for making this happen.  Peter just started his sophomore year and is hearing much better in class and in the hallways and is less tired at the end of a school day. 

Because this surgery was Peter's decision, he is 100% vested in caring for the device, and he wears it without being reminded.  Although he would've benefited from having it sooner, making the decision himself was a powerful lesson in self-advocacy.  He ultimately has to manage his own healthcare, and this was an opportunity for him to do that.

Choosing kind,

Shout Out to EWG Jr. High School in Rhode Island!

Exeter West Greenwich Jr. High School in Rhode Island chose Wonder by R.J. Palacio as their "One Book One School" summer reading program. When classes resumed in the fall, the school held a "Wonder Walk" on their track and raised $4,000 that was donated to Children's Craniofacial Association. This money is helping CCA provide medical-travel assistance to "Real-Life Auggies," funding family scholarships to CCA's annual craniofacial retreat, and supporting CCA's #ChooseKIND Education Curriculum for schools.

The school showed Peter's WonderKid Video about his life at their assembly and then listened to a special video message that Peter sent thanking them for hosting the walk. Below are links and photos from the event. Thanks EWG Jr. High School! You are making the world a kinder place for everyone, no matter what they look like.

Celebrate #ChooseKIND Day on 10/10!

Peter and his brother, Jacob, want you to celebrate #ChooseKIND day with them on 10/10. Here's their special SHOUT OUT FOR KINDNESS...

Peter's birthday was 10/7

Help Him Make Kindness Contagious!

Donate to Peter's HBD campaign

All funds will go toward donating more copies of

Wonder by R.J. Palacio to schools around the country

Welcome to Pete's Diary!

Welcome to "Pete's Diary" blog and website.  Peter will be booking #ChooseKind school visits in the Northern Chicago suburbs for the 2015/2016 school year.  Peter talks to students after they read the book Wonder by R.J. Palacio.  The main character in Palacio's story is Auggie, who has a craniofacial syndrome and experiences difficulty fitting in at a new school.  Peter relates real-life experiences to scenes from the book and also enjoys sharing some of his more personal fake-ear stories!  To request Peter for a school visit or Skype session, please email info@petesdiary.com. Stay tuned & #ChooseKind!